I’m getting back together with my first love

You may not know this, but Spider-man was my first love… When it comes to comic books. In real life it was will smith. But I digress…

I just bought so many spider-man books. So this week will now be dubbed Spider-week as it’s all I’ll be reviewing. Sorry not sorry.

Next week will be wayyy more normal! Promise!

 

Spider-Man Homecoming

Just got back from seeing the new Spider-Man movie. I was not planning on seeing it, but somehow I was pulled in.

I wanted to protest this movie for several reasons, A) there’s too many superhero movies B) There’s too many Spider-man movies C) I’m not in it.

So a little more background on why I didn’t necessarily want to give in and see this movie is because of the civil war movie where he is introduced… See, I’m still pretty upset about the timeline, because as we all know that during the actual superhero civil war Peter Parker was a 27 year old married science teacher. Not a sophomore in high school.

civil-war-spider-man-edit
So basically half of my life so far…

Other than that I didn’t hate it. Here’s some things I loved. I loved how diverse the cast was. There were Asians and black kids and I think Flash Thompson was Indian! I loved that Donald Glover was in it for a hot second! Too bad he wasn’t cast as Spider-Man and instead was technically “The Prowler.” They really threw that “Prowler” thing in just to name drop. He really didn’t do anything Prowler-y and I don’t  think they’re saving this character for a sequel. Kind of a waste to throw that character down the toilet, IMHO.

ALSO they were calling Zendaya “Michelle” Um no, her name is Mary-Jane mother fucking Watson.

I loved that Liz Allen was black and that Peter’s best friend was umm…Filipino? I think… I’m pretty sure that character was based on Miles Morales’ best friend, so I let this slide as well. He was a great character addition, the guy in the chair. He won my heart. However, we all know Peter didn’t have any friends in high school. Zero. Real, real  big nerd. He was almost a nerd in a creepy way, too. In movies he’s portrayed as a lovable smart guy, but honestly in the original books he was a definite spaz until he went to college and got hot. Also Aunt May in the movie was hot. That’s not the aunt May we know and love. There was a lot I had to get on board with which angers my nerd heart. In this case I was into it because SOMETIMES I think movies can be a second chance for comic books where they went wrong. 

spider nerd
Why would Peter want to hang out with these jerks anyway?

SPOILERS AHOY

These magical writers were able to tie in that Liz Allen’s dad was the Vulture the whole time. That would mean that Adrian Toomes and his wife were pretty progressive in giving their daughter the mom’s maiden name or they are messing around with a character’s real name again a la this “Michelle” BS.

vulture
Geriatric Super Villain

This movie made the vulture cool, which I never thought would be possible. But my nerd heart was happy because the Vulture was the first major villain that Peter ever fought so it was really fitting for our high-school boy to take on this guy in his coming out movie! Okay, I really felt for the Vulture, too. He was a nice guy. I loved his super villain backstory of just being a working-class guy trying to make a living for his family who keeps getting screwed over by the man. What makes someone a bad person is all about perspective really. Like, he never meant his friend to turn into dust when he shot him with that gun, that was just an accident he took really well and nobody around him remotely cared about. 

Happy and Iron Man were heavily prevalent in the film since Marvel is doing cross-over to death. They really showed how green Peter Parker really is. Like when one of Iron Man’s drones saved Peter’s life. (THANK GOD!) Or when the real Iron Man saved a Staten Island Ferry that had been cut in half by the vulture and his Chitauri weapons. Tony Stark really tries to “dad” it up in this movie and he does an amazing job because in the end Peter Parker really grows up and morphs into one entity.

All in all the movie earns an A from me. The action scenes were incredible, the villain was super powerful and intimidating, the cast was culturally so diverse, it was kind of funny and then of course… THEY THREW IN THIS LITTLE GEM

peeta.jpg

Love you Spidey.

And I sort of understand the Homecoming title now.

Peter Parker: The Spectacular Spider-Man!!

I LOVE SPIDER-MAN. I always have and I always will. Wanna fight about it?

I remember when the first Spectacular Spider-Man came out, well I don’t actually remember it because it was in the 1970s…but I remember buying the reprinted volumes!

If you’re not reading The Amazing Spider-Man like I’m not then you have no idea what’s going on with this guy. Apparently he’s the same old Peter we love yet he has slightly more powers. I don’t know what those are because I didn’t read the Amazing Spider-Man, but I did read “The Other” several years ago and the powers he got from his rebirth were amazing, but he lost them and now he’s got new ones. IDK. KEEP UP! So now he has even more “great responsibility” at least that’s what he told The Human Torch, his best friend, on the roof of some random building in NYC before he hugged HT and told him he loved him. Then they planned to go to the movies at 7:30 that night. Fucking beautiful.

johnny storm
Forbidden love

So Pete’s really having a bear of a time being a legit superhero and saving the world and he just wants to get back to his roots of stopping petty thieves on the streets of New York City. He doesn’t have to look far for a street robbery and immediately jumps in to save a lady from being robbed. Unfortunately his handy web cartridges crap out on him and he almost gets shot in the face but luckily he is saved by the incredible shrinking Ant-Man.

Not being able to save her life doesn’t bother the lady it seems because she still hands Spider-Man her card and asks him on a date while Ant-Man, who actually saved her, just looks on being very short. Because he has helmet problems. You need to know that for later. Oh and the lady’s name is Rebecca London. WOW. COOL.

ANYWAYS… Ant-Man invites Peter to come with him to “The Mason” so they can get their gear fixed together. Man Date.

ant man
Do you see how they look at each other?

Peter has never heard of “The Mason” which apparently is very weird because all the superheroes know about him. Rude.

He’s the Tinkerer’s brother, so maybe that’s why no one told Peter? Because The tinkerer is one of Spider-Man’s enemies? I can’t think of one reason why else EVERYONE knows about this guy except Spider-Man.

Oh totally forgot to mention that Peter picked up an unbreakable cell phone at the scene of the earlier robbery, so he shows it to the Mason’s attendant so he can help him find a hacker. The information they find out about another hacked cell phone leads Peter to Chicago, and to call the lady he saved earlier. Apparently calling a girl 8 hours after she gives you her number is a bad idea according to these editors. They said you should wait at least a day and to text not call… as a girl, I do not agree. If I gave you my number you better use it and quick. The window of interest shuts fast.

Spider-Man finds the house of the Stark hacker and ya know, threatens to arrest whoever is inside immediately. Not very stealth but when you have a Spider-sense I guess you don’t need to be stealthy. After Spidey makes his threat he is immediately blown up and confronted by Ironheart, the apparent hacker.

It’s 7:39 and Peter is in Chicago, a long ways away from his date with the Human Torch. Poor Torchy is waiting for his pal outside of Pete’s apartment, but instead of finding Peter he finds his sister. No, not Johnny Storm’s sister, Peter’s sister. YUP.

PeterParkerSpectacularSpider-Man1-p20

OOOOKKKKAAAYY that was pretty good. Lots of big shot characters making appearances in his first Spectacular issue, but wait it’s not over yet! There is a bonus story at the end.

I like these short stories, they’re always so deep. In this case it’s not deep though, it’s more like a teaser after the end of one of the Marvel movies of what’s to come. And what’s to come gives me MASSIVE amounts of anxiety.  LIKE MASSIVE. I don’t know if you get it, but I have real feelings about this. So here’s what happens, Black Widow fights Spider-Man and uses a device to follow his every move and spidey-sense, once she gathers all the info she needs on his spider-sense she hands it over, somewhat unwillingly, to a sleezy SHIELD agent. NOW ALL THE SHIELD AGENTS WILL HAVE SPIDEY SENSE. NOT COOL. After that I imagine she goes home to take a long hot shower to wash off the shame.
SHAME!

shame

Defenders #1

I’m assuming that if you’re going to watch the Defenders on Netflix then first you must purchase this comic book series so you can find out what the series is going to be about. That’s how they get ya!

So we begin with some hot-shot drug dealer who looks more like someone who works in finance than drug dealing, and he is being pretty pathetic and trying to impress some ladies.

His plan to get laid goes awry when a mysterious man in a hat and trench coat shoves some laundry detergent down his throat, which kills him. Spoiler. Should have said that first.

Mystery man kills this guy with laundry detergent because the finance guy was selling to drug-users and it was killing them…I think. That’s not explicitly said but since finance guy was killed by the laundry detergent I can only assume. So this mystery man is some Robin Hood of sorts. Killing drug dealers and saving drug users.

Oh! I forgot to mention, he dropped some FUCKING DIAMONDS on the finance guys dead corpse before walking out unscathed as a security guard just stared with his mouth open.

That was the prologue, now we’re being reintroduced to Luke Cage. Oh my gosh I’m just realizing, did Nick Cage steal his name?!

So yeah anyways there’s an explosion right away and Cage (Luke, not Nick) saves two little girls, blah blah.

VEERRYY CONVENIENT because one of the little girls was just asking where Jessica Jones and it seemed that Mr. Cage did not want to answer that question.

Oh and there’s diamonds.

On the next page we find out where Jessica is and she’s been shot and so she’s in the hospital. We also find Daredevil hanging out in the ceiling waiting to jump down. Like imagine what he’s doing that whole time just waiting for Cage to walk in. He literally burst down from a ceiling tile. He was just waiting in the rafters. What kind of free-time does a superhero/lawyer have?

Daredevil informs Cage that he was also attacked and then Iron Fist slopes in after an attack he had as well. After one minute of trying to figure out who is attacking all of them Jessica wakes up and says it was Diamondback. The problem is, he’s dead. The good news is the hospital staff bursts into the room because the heroes set off a bunch of security alarms. I am at least happy that they’re monitoring their ceilings for uninvited occupants.

And, I have just turned the page and am now crying happy tears because the Black Cat, Felicia Hardy, is somehow going to be involved in this. YAY!

Luke Cage is the first to find Diamondback and they start beating the crap out of each other while Black Cat watches in horror. It turns out Cage isn’t strong enough on his own to defeat Diamondback, and his pals are at the bar thinking about teaming up. I think when they find out their best friend got beat up they will seal the deal.

Oh my this was good. I very much enjoyed this book and I like getting to know characters that are not as popular as others. I guess I’ll be following up with #2 and binge watching their netflix series this August.

 

 

 

 

So what am I actually reading?!

Since starting this new blog I have recapped a lot of #1 issues, so when did I pick up #2 and so forth?

Well my favorite that I discovered from doing this blog is Scarlet Spider! I’m on #3 right now and can’t wait for #4 to come out and I will most likely continue to read this comic as it comes out. Ben Reilly is just so funny and fucked up. He’s trying to do right after his stint as a super villain, and what a guy! A clone with no real family or friends wants to do the right thing? Easily someone could become evil but he’s out here trying to be a hero. And he’s sooo funny. I could listen to him comment on paint drying and I would love it. 

Another one that I am following up with is Secret Empire, and this is because I have to. I am morally obligated to keep up with this story line. It’s like missing out on the Civil War. I can’t call myself a Marvel fan and have no idea what is going on in the Marvel World like this. A huge story like this only comes along once every few years and it’s a big one. I mean Captain America is a Russian spy. If you’re not reading Secret Empire you are wrong.

What I liked but have been lazy about…

Nick Fury. Now that was an amazing #1. I think I’ll wait until the series comes out into hard-ish cover, or whatever you would call that, it’s weird to call it paperback since they’re all paper backs. This is something I might force my boyfriend or another guy who is not really into comic books to read. I think it’s a good one to get someone into comic books.

MIsfit City. I might also wait for the full series to come out to buy this one. I really want to see how this story goes. Maybe I haven’t continued yet because I haven’t seen #2 at my comic book store yet.

Batwoman. This I haven’t seen #2 at my comic book store yet either, not that I was looking, but I really, really liked this comic book. Maybe I’ll wait for the whole series to come out or maybe I won’t be able to wait. I guess I’ll find out one of these Wednesdays.

What I continued with and kind of don’t care about anymore.

Jean Grey. So I recently picked up #2 and realized that this story is about a little girl who is afraid of her future of becoming a Phoenix. I would probably give this to my niece to read. If she wasn’t a week old, I mean. I don’t know any other children so I have no one to recommend this to.

Weapon X. Meh. This could have been so good and it’s just not. Maybe I’ll give it one more shot. My expectations were so high and I’m just so disappointed.

Elektra. I couldn’t take that arcade storyline. I liked that she was in Vegas but then all of a sudden she was trapped in Murderworld. I think it would have been more fun if she stayed in Vegas.

What I’m looking forward to…

Iceman. I will be purchasing #2. I think this is going to be really good. I missed looking out for it last week, maybe it was sold out? But I will definitely have an eagle eye out for it this week.

So basically yeah that’s it. This week I will be reviewing Defenders #1 and Peter Parker the Spectacular Spider-Man #1. I just previously reviewed Cable #1 and my answer to if I’ll be continuing on with that series is in the previous post!

Thanks for reading True Believers!

Cable #1

Do you guys love how clever I am with post titles??

Do you also love how I say “You guys” even though there’s only like one person reading this?!

In time. Yes, time. You guys will see.

N-E-WAYZ

I love Cable because he is best friends with my best friend, Deadpool.

bestfriends
Editor’s note: Deadpool’s stint as an X-Man came with a costume change.

So the time-displaced war hero and son of Cyclop’s and Jean Grey’s (clone?)  has traveled back in time to the 1800s in Arizona. Thank God he’s white! AMIRIGHT!?

From what I have learned from these first few pages is that a bunch of cliche robbers are sitting around a poker table in and old-timey saloon, as they were called in those days, and it’s a little weird because there’s a few dead bodies laying around them and everyone else who is alive is in a panic.

I think they need a hero.

And huzzah he has arrived!

cable

Dramatically…he enters dramatically.

Now, things get interesting. SO INTERESTING IN FACT, that these 1800s robbers/murderers have future laser guns!

HOW DID THEY GET THEM!?

I think we’re about to find out.

Well not this issue but perhaps next…

Cable beats these guys up and asks them questions about the guy who gave them the guns.

And apparently this guy can transport through time. At least it sounds that way since the guy he questioned said that he “vanished back inta thin air again.”

HRM????

BODYSLIDE BY TWO ANYONE!!? I will literally die if Cable is hunting Deadpool RN.

So Cable disappears in the same crop field the other guy disappeared into which for some reason transports him into Japan in 1543… IDK! I have so many questions…let’s read on.

Also this is great because it’s filled with so many determined Cable faces.

He meets a random Japanese woman, the only survivor (plus her infant son) of a deathly battle as he watches her village burn down. He promises to avenge her son and not her, which, I mean, is a little sexist.

He continues on his journey to find a group of Japanese warriors. He was clearly looking for them, I’m assuming these guys were the ones who burnt down the village.

Anyways they kick Cable’s arse with pixelated-future-fire swords and it does not look good for him…

I think my Deadpool theory is concluded, they would have definitely thrown him in the ending of the first issue if he was behind it, because that would like , triple the sales.

Cable usually has some more interesting friends to carry his story lines so it’s a risk to give him his own solo book. If you’re a big Cable fan you probably hate me for saying that, but my favorite characters are the funny ones or the dramatic ones. Cable is the type of guy you should marry. He’s stable and secure and knows what he wants, but girls still fuck around with the Clint Barton’s of the world. I think I need a second opinion to sell me on him before I go pick up #2.

 

Still love you Cable, mean it.

IceMan #1

I was almost deterred from picking up this book because the cover reminded me of chibi. That anime-shit. And don’t get me wrong, I love anime but I never understood why they would get angry and start looking like this.

angry chibi
Why you get smol when you get angry?

 

I DON’T GET IT.

Luckily I opened the actual book and it was your typical X-Men comic so I was like heck yes and bought it. And then I started to really appreciate the cover and the saying to “never judge a book by a cover.” which I never believed in until today. Always go with your gut instinct. If you think they’re a serial killer, they are. But now I might just get into a stranger’s vehicle…

So as we know, the original X-Men have been “time displaced” so there’s a second Iceman here too. And that gets very confusing for me. Luckily our main character wears clothes while his displaced-time mini-me opts for a more au natural look. And I’m thankful for this but also still confused.

The time-displaced one has a boyfriend. I have no idea why or how this happened, because I was pretty sure that Iceman came out so much later than his replacement. I am probably missing a huge chunk of story and please if you follow this story, feel free to butcher me in the comments.

OKAY! So this is very adorable. Not only does this comic begin as his gay-dating profile, but it climaxes at a text from his mother telling him his father just had an attack that was of the heart variety but not an actual heart attack. IDK. Ask Marvel. Not me. They hire multiple trained doctors to oversee every story, I hire 0 for this blog.

Only one of those statements is true.

MOVING ON…

Poor Bobby, his mom and dad don’t really care that he’s there for them, because he missed his mom’s birthday because he was saving the world.

They have a point, doe. If it wasn’t for your mom you wouldn’t even be in this world to save.

Like how many times has your mother threatened “I brought you into this world, I’ll take you out.”? If the answer is none you need to sort out your priorities because your mother gave you too much credit.

Bobby’s parents decided to spring onto him on the hospital that they also sold his childhood home and live somewhere else now.

#Whitepeopleproblems

SORRY we only have two extra bedrooms as opposed to five and now the indoor pool is an outdoor pool!

While Bob is visiting his fam, a robot breaks in to destroy him, natch,

He goes all Iceman on this phony’s ass and saves the lives of all of the civilians and doctors .

BUT because he got all Iceman-y in the hospital, his mother and father decide it would be best if he left so they can keep a low-profile.

Bobby daydreams about a life where his parents are proud of him for being a FUCKING X-MAN and also where they are excited to meet his boyfriend.

You know why I’m excited for this comic book?

Because not only does he have to deal with the stigmatism of being a mutant, he is also gay.

You know why I’m super pumped for this comic more than anything in the world?

It is because it will be written by a gay man. And he’s not just a gay man, he’s a comic book writer. Gay is normal, and comic books are FABULOUS! And I just want the world to know this.

Misfit City #1

I strayed from Marvel again! Opting for Boom! Box. Which I’ve never heard of before. I’m basic. We know this. There must be something in my water because I am really straying this week. But don’t worry, I’ll be back with Marvel vengeance next week… That would be a good series title. I decided on […]

I strayed from Marvel again! Opting for Boom! Box. Which I’ve never heard of before.

I’m basic. We know this.

There must be something in my water because I am really straying this week. But don’t worry, I’ll be back with Marvel vengeance next week… That would be a good series title.

I decided on this comic book at the spur of the moment. I love the word “misfit” for some reason, and the cover was an all-female cast in a map. So, I was pretty sure it was going to be at least cute.

And I’m not wrong.

On the cover the girls and their dog are on an old school map where X marks the spot. The characters are all very different looking, and as I read the story they have completely different personalities as well as looks/styles.

Two of the girls work at the coffee hut together and their other friend works at the museum.

They’re from a small town called Cannon Cove. Not much happens in Cannon Cove, in fact the greatest thing to ever happen to their town was a cult-classic movie called “The Gloomies.” Sound familiar? I should mention that the girls hate Cannon Cove and they especially hate “The Gloomies” movie because of all the tourists it has brought.

This book is great because it’s basically an adaption of what the writers think would go on in a town the “Goonies” was filmed in, years later. I like that they’re using an all-girl cast because I am a hardcore feminist I decided.

These girls are all very sassy. Wilder is the brains, Dot is the muscle ( I say this because earlier she was fishing but not on a boat, INSIDE of the lake in one of those rain boot jumpsuits), Macy is the trouble-maker cause she wears Ramones tees and Karma is the bubbly, annoying one.

Misfit City CR: BOOM! Studios
Karma being annoying.

After we are introduced to the girls, we are introduced to the villains. The book doesn’t come right out and say, “and here are the villains” but the woman looks like Cruella De Ville and the guy looks like a thousand year old vampire, and not the sparkly kind. The villains’ rich uncle has died and they are hearing about what they have received from the will. They received a house and a boat, but the one thing they actually wanted was a chest. The chest was donated to the museum Macy works at and where the girls hold their weekly poker game. Luckily these girls are very bad at poker, or at least very unlucky because they lost several times in a row to their dog, Pippin. Losing to a dog at poker forces them to find out what is in that chest, because that is of course more interesting than a poker-playing dog. As we know, all dogs are amazing at poker.

dogs playing poker
It’s literally all they ever do.

The chest is sort of interesting, but when they close it after they all get bored that’s when the real fun happens. A map pops out of a secret compartment and this map leads to a damn treasure.

Wilder wants to follow the map, but Macy is a wet-blanket despite her “cool-girl” style of dreads and a nose ring. Like, I assumed this girl would be the first to follow a map to some money. But alas, all of Wilder’s friends say no and leave the poker party.

The End!

Just kidding.

What a horrible comic book that would be! Although I’d say there is some lesson of life in there somewhere.

Luckily the story continues. Macy arrives at home and hands some lyrics to a song she’s working on to her bandmate. A short time later her mother gets a phone call that the museum’s alarm is going off. So in this town for this particular museum they clearly don’t believe in hiring a security guard for the museum at night so they have the next best thing and send in a teen-age girl to handle the possible burglary. Might I also add that the mother doesn’t find this strange at all and forces her daughter to go saying “Roger is paying you to do this.”

Okay who is this Roger and why is he being so shady right now?

Anyways, Macy arrives back at the museum to turn off the alarm. After she turns the alarm off she is immediately whacked over the head.

Later, she is being hauled off into an ambulance on a stretcher, but seems fine otherwise. Her, what I can only assume is her brother/bandmate possible love interest? I don’t know they haven’t made it clear yet and Wilder meet her at the ambulance, wondering if she’s okay. It turns out she is okay and also saved the day by writing her song lyrics on the map! Apparently getting hit over the head with a blunt object makes you believe following an old treasure map is a great idea because from there they decide to do it!

YAY!

Wow this story was really cute. I can’t wait to see what is at the end of this treasure map. AND IT BETTER NOT BE A FREAKING LET DOWN. I WANT TO SEE CASH. DIAMONDS. PEARLS. WHATEVER ELSE RICH PEOPLE BE HIDIN IN TREASURE CHESTS. I would also feel the story would have a great ending if it led to the burial site of hundreds of murdered bodies from the same serial killer. BECAUSE THEN they have the perfect sequel.

Tata for now.

Misfit City #1

I strayed from Marvel again! Opting for Boom! Box. Which I’ve never heard of before.

I’m basic. We know this.

There must be something in my water because I am really straying this week. But don’t worry, I’ll be back with Marvel vengeance next week… That would be a good series title.

I decided on this comic book at the spur of the moment. I love the word “misfit” for some reason, and the cover was an all-female cast in a map. So, I was pretty sure it was going to be at least cute.

And I’m not wrong.

On the cover the girls and their dog are on an old school map where X marks the spot. The characters are all very different looking, and as I read the story they have completely different personalities as well as looks/styles.

Two of the girls work at the coffee hut together and their other friend works at the museum.

They’re from a small town called Cannon Cove. Not much happens in Cannon Cove, in fact the greatest thing to ever happen to their town was a cult-classic movie called “The Gloomies.” Sound familiar? I should mention that the girls hate Cannon Cove and they especially hate “The Gloomies” movie because of all the tourists it has brought.

This book is great because it’s basically an adaption of what the writers think would go on in a town the “Goonies” was filmed in, years later. I like that they’re using an all-girl cast because I am a hardcore feminist I decided.

These girls are all very sassy. Wilder is the brains, Dot is the muscle ( I say this because earlier she was fishing but not on a boat, INSIDE of the lake in one of those rain boot jumpsuits), Macy is the trouble-maker cause she wears Ramones tees and Karma is the bubbly, annoying one.

Misfit City CR: BOOM! Studios
Example: Karma being annoying.

After we are introduced to the girls, we are introduced to the villains. The book doesn’t come right out and say, “and here are the villains” but the woman looks like Cruella De Ville and the guy looks like a thousand year old vampire, and not the sparkly kind. The villains’ rich uncle has died and they are hearing about what they have received from the will. They received a house and a boat, but the one thing they actually wanted was a chest. The chest was donated to the museum Macy works at and where the girls hold their weekly poker game. Luckily these girls are very bad at poker, or at least very unlucky because they lost several times in a row to their dog, Pippin. Losing to a dog at poker forces them to find out what is in that chest, because that is of course more interesting than a poker-playing dog. As we know, all dogs are amazing at poker.

dogs playing poker
It’s literally all they ever do.

The chest is sort of interesting, but when they close it after they all get bored that’s when the real fun happens. A map pops out of a secret compartment and this map leads to a damn treasure.

Wilder wants to follow the map, but Macy is a wet-blanket despite her “cool-girl” style of dreads and a nose ring. Like, I assumed this girl would be the first to follow a map to some money. But alas, all of Wilder’s friends say no and leave the poker party.

The End!

Just kidding.

What a horrible comic book that would be! Although I’d say there is some lesson of life in there somewhere.

Luckily the story continues. Macy arrives at home and hands some lyrics to a song she’s working on to her bandmate. A short time later her mother gets a phone call that the museum’s alarm is going off. So in this town for this particular museum they clearly don’t believe in hiring a security guard for the museum at night so they have the next best thing and send in a teen-age girl to handle the possible burglary. Might I also add that the mother doesn’t find this strange at all and forces her daughter to go saying “Roger is paying you to do this.”

Okay who is this Roger and why is he being so shady right now?

Anyways, Macy arrives back at the museum to turn off the alarm. After she turns the alarm off she is immediately whacked over the head.

Later, she is being hauled off into an ambulance on a stretcher, but seems fine otherwise. Her, what I can only assume is her brother/bandmate possible love interest? I don’t know they haven’t made it clear yet and Wilder meet her at the ambulance, wondering if she’s okay. It turns out she is okay and also saved the day by writing her song lyrics on the map! Apparently getting hit over the head with a blunt object makes you believe following an old treasure map is a great idea because from there they decide to do it!

YAY!

Wow this story was really cute. I can’t wait to see what is at the end of this treasure map. AND IT BETTER NOT BE A FREAKING LET DOWN. I WANT TO SEE CASH. DIAMONDS. PEARLS. WHATEVER ELSE RICH PEOPLE BE HIDIN IN TREASURE CHESTS. I would also feel the story would have a great ending if it led to the burial site of hundreds of murdered bodies from the same serial killer. BECAUSE THEN they have the perfect sequel.

Tata for now.

IF MARVEL CHARACTERS WERE GAME OF THRONES CHARACTERS

Marvel heroes and villains as Game of Thrones Characters

I know that you all wet yourself a little bit. The greatest list of the best heroes and villains of the Marvel Universe re-imagined as some of the best heroes and villains of Westeros!

Ned Stark – Captain America AKA Steve Rogers

I should start by saying Ned Stark is the Captain America before Cap became all agent of Hydra-y. They’re both driven by the need to do what’s right and just. They both went through early traumas, Captain America losing both his parents and Ned losing both of his siblings. They both spent their youth fighting in a war and because of this, they exude a vibe of “old man who has seen it all.” They’re both giving off heavy dad vibes. Since, Ned is an actual Dad and Captain America is basically the dad of America.

Catelyn Stark – Scarlet Witch AKA Wanda Maximoff

Catelyn and Wanda both love being moms and will do anything for their families. They’re both attractive brunettes that a lot of people want dead, although neither of them seem to be able to be kept down for long.

Robb Stark – Spider-Man AKA Peter Parker

I don’t know if Robb Stark was ever a nerd, probably not, but he definitely has a lot in common with Peter Parker. Stark is very close to his mother and Parker is very close to his aunt. They both seem willing to do anything for the mother/mother figure in their life. They both have shown unwavering loyalty, force of will, bravery, strength, intelligence and are both unswayed by temptation. Their lives both changed when their respective father/father figure’s were tragically killed. They spend a lot of time alone planning out their next fight and are all around “good-guys.”

Jon Snow – Nova

Jon Snow and Nova started out as whiny little teenagers that made poor decisions to fight a battle that wasn’t theirs. Jon Snow started out as a cocky showboat on the wall, while Nova also started out pretty cocky and liked to banter during his early sparrings. Both of them did a 180 and grew up real quick. Jon Snow, realizing he knew nothing, became a brooding yet steadfast warrior. Nova, procures a scar, and all of a sudden he’s a dark and brooding hero, too.

Arya Stark – X-23

Two little girls who are not afraid to murder. They’re both really bad at making friends their same gender and oftentimes, their own age. They spent their childhoods learning to fight and are basically tiny, baby weapons of destruction because of it.

Sansa Stark – Mary Jane Watson

Two gingers who are inexplicably popular with men and basically get passed around like a fetish object to an entire cast.

Bran Stark – Daredevil

Both of these characters suffered a disability at a young age, and both were endowed with a different set of powers because of it. Daredevil lost his eyesight but developed a “radar sense” as well as superhuman taste, smell, hearing and touch senses. Bran lost his favorite past time, climbing up walls, because he eventually got thrown from a tower for being a “peeping Tom.” This caused him to lose his ability to walk, but he also gained an ability of being a “warg” which means he can control the minds of animals. Poster babies for silver linings.

Jamie Lannister – Iron Man AKA Tony Stark

These guys love fame and being wealthy. It really helps them out of trouble sometimes and sometimes it gets them into worse trouble. They both have a streak of arrogance. Of course that changed when Tony was captured by terrorists and when Jamie Lannister lost his hands, they both became a bit more complicated. Still handsome, though.

Cersei Lannister – Mystique

You push these ladies down, they’ll come back stronger and stronger. They’re both masters of seduction and can pull one over on most people, however they often get their comeuppance. I think Cersei maybe a bit more obsessive over her children, but Mystique loves her kids too. They’ve both had children who have turned their backs on their “evil” mothers and each had a child that was so evil it was kind of a relief to see them die. Too soon?

Joffrey Baratheon – Arcade

I wasn’t sure which psychopathic Marvel Villain to go with for Joffrey, then the answer hit me and it was just so obvious. Arcade! They’re both obviously crazy, from the moment you look at them you can tell something is off. Whereas someone like Maximus can pass with his charm, and Purple Man can basically control you to not think he’s nuts, Arcade has it all out and yet he appears harmless. They were both born to wealthy families and act like spoiled, selfish children. And let’s be real, Murderworld sounds like a wet dream for Joffrey.

Tommen Baratheon – Nightcrawler

Maybe Nightcrawler is a BAMF and Tommen not so much, but he’ll get there. Maybe. Both of them have a demon for a parent. Okay Tommen’s parents aren’t actually “demons” but they have demons. Nightcrawler and Tommen are also both extremely religious; at least for a stint.

Myrcella Baratheon – Gwen Stacy

Gwen and Myrcella have a lot in common outside of their untimely deaths. Like the fact that they were just innocent little girls who got killed because of another person’s battle. They’re both really close to their dads, even though one thought her dad was her uncle for a while…

Tyrion Lannister – Beast

The Beast is a brilliant scientist, Tyrion is a brilliant politician. Both struggle with their looks, as the Beast is covered in blue fur and Tyrion is a dwarf. However, the Beast hasn’t had much trouble getting girls, and Tyrion has enough money to pay for them. The biggest thing they have in common is the need to be remembered for the genius within and not the beast on the outside.

Khal Drogo – Warpath

I’m almost too proud of myself for this. They both have amazing names (nicknames and real.) They both like to stay within their tribes. They’re really great at fighting and very strong, but um… they’re both extremely vulnerable to magic…

Daenerys Targaryen – Storm

Stormborn anyone? One can control the weather, the other can control dragons. They’re both scary, beautiful and have white hair and everyone’s best interest at heart. Although, sometimes when they lead they can make mistakes (*cough* pissing off inhumans, *cough* pissing off slave owners), but we rest well knowing every decision these heroes make is because they have the greater good in mind.

Ramsay Bolton –  Maximus.

Ramsay IS Maximus. They’re both family outcasts with psychopathic charm and are conventionally attractive. They’ll cut off all your hair or your genitals and say it was all so they could be “accepted by their families.” Call the wambulance on these bros.  

Sandor Clegane – Hulk

He’s not only a raging beast, he’s also a pretty nice guy.

Gregor Celgane – Juggernaut

Nothing can stop the Juggernaut…or the Mountain.

Brienne of Tarth – Captain Marvel

Brienne of Tarth and Carole Danvers have a lot in common. Carole Danvers has struggled to be seen as an equal to her male peers since her childhood was spent always competing against her brothers. Brienne never wanted to be a noble-woman, preferring the life of a knight. They’re both feminist icons who will be remembered in their respective histories for their individual strides towards equality.

Theon Greyjoy – Hawkeye then Weasel

Theon Greyjoy’s personality did a 180 from the beginning of the game of thrones story to what we know of him know. So I think he may have started out as Clint Barton-esque, definitely talented with a bow and arrow and also a total ladies man. A ladies man who gets slapped a lot. Just like Clint! After Theon’s impromptu castration, he became more like Weasel. Someone who will sell out his friends, but may come through for you when you least expect it.

Lord Varys – Professor X

I wanted to pick a villain, but since Gretchen Weiners is in a different universe I went with Professor X. He knows everything about everyone just like Varys. Plus they both use children to do their bidding and they’re bald! TWINSIES!

Mance Rayder – Magneto

They’re both leaders of anarchy. I think they get a bad rap, the difference between right and wrong is a matter of opinion. Amiright?

Grey Worm – Cyclops

Nice guys finish first, buuuut they have really messed up love lives. Grey Worm is unable to consummate his love for Missandei. Cyclops loves Jean Grey, but he can’t seem to get her to stay alive long enough for them to stay together. Another thing these men have in common is that they’re both leaders to a group of their own peers. I don’t think that Grey Worm is the most powerful of the unsullied, and I know for sure Cyclops isn’t the most powerful X-Man, but there’s just something you can trust about these guys. I’d follow either one of them into battle.

Last and certainly the least;

The sand snakes – The reptilious B.A.D girls, obviously.

Okay my brain hurts. What other Marvel characters would make great GoT characters? Do you agree or disagree with this list? Sound off in the comments below!